Authenticity is a tough one. Oprah makes it sound easy as she proclaims authenticity's profound value. She repeats that each and every one of us has a purpose for being here and that it's our responsibility to seek out that purpose and fulfill it, regardless of how small or seemingly insignificant others may view it.
Perhaps when we are young, we wear our authentic selves as naturally and visibly as we wear our most comfortable jeans. Our purpose for being here is to have fun, experience the new - basically just to grab life by the balls and keep moving!
I'm finding this is contrary to the search for one's authentic self in the middle years of life. I think it's called a mid-life crisis. It's like the cataracts my grandma had surgery for.The view for one's genuine self seems a little cloudy after you pass 50. The time clock is tickin' and in moments of self-reflection, panic can set in like dysentery after a bad burrito.
Like a recent chick flick, where the main character, in fear of a spinster future, takes a second look at all her former boyfriends to see if she might have overlooked a good one, I'm inclined to believe I may have to look back and examine my mammoth inventory of jobs, unfulfilled aspirations, and self-help books. Surely there is a subtle clue among the twisted paths of my past that may dump some enlightenment on me in spite of myself.
Oprah! I haven't seen you but I know you're out there on that other network. Listen up. You told us to find our authentic selves...that each one of us has a purpose for being here, but I must have missed the show where you gave the instructions for this horrendous challenge! I'm sorry. I've never learned to use my DVR. I'm bad.
I'll keep searching because I know the real me, is in me, trying to claw it's way out. I wonder if they could see that on my last mammogram?
Later and probably between the lines, with a red crayon,
me.
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